. broken hearted girl

[layla sinclair]

i owe my daddy too much to settle for a career like that. he believes i can do better, so i do

[ayla villamore]

Sounds like you got your path set then. Good for you. Hope you stick to it, cause it would be a shame for that to go downhill.

[layla sinclair]

i'll be happy if i don't go downhill either. we can't all be as talented as you though, ayla.

[ayla villamore]

No one is perfect, not even me. I've had my rough times, making what I have now wasn't easy. Especially being taken seriously. You don't compare do you? Because we've been over that.

[layla sinclair]

i know that feeling.. but i'm not i promise. just healthy competition or something..

[ayla villamore]

Why? After everything, I thought you made it clear I wasn't something you'd want as some role model. I married a criminal, I'm unfair, I hold grudges, I don't know what forgiveness is, i'm a monster etc etc. Sorry if I find it extremely strange that you'd want to compete with me, or even be similar.

[layla sinclair]

you know none of that is true, and even i knew it wasn't true. you hurt me saying all those things about lukas and i wanted to hurt you back, but none of them are true. you know i've always wanted to be like you and i knew malcolm wasn't exactly perfect but he loves you and you made him a better man and i wanted to be that girl for lukas... you were right to be upset with me and you weren't being unfair. but i hope that you can accept my apology when i say i'm deeply sorry for everything i did and how i betrayed you and how i want things to be better between us. maybe not what they used to be, but at least civil.

[ayla villamore]

Apologies get old after a while, you know. If anything though, hearing it in person might be a little better. Maybe. I just never understood how you could compare the two of them. Lukas was psycho. And he never treated you right, Layla. Ever. It hurt me that you just.. took it. And was oblivious, like that was the norm. I mean, for so long I thought, god damn, she can't be that stupid. But then I realized your life isn't my life, so I can't tell you what to do, or what decisions to make. I just hoped that you'd realize how horrible he treated the people who once cared about you, and you'd come around. Are you saying that time finally came?

[layla sinclair]

I know he was horrible and unstable but I loved him and I thought that was all I deserved. I thought if I loved him enough he would change and love me like I loved him. but he didn't, I changed instead to suit him. and I know you cared but I guess in the end it was on me to throw away that part of my life with him. but I don't regret it, I guess I can just learn from it. I know love isn't everything anymore and it can't conquer all. it was stupid but I still loved him til the end. I knew he wasn't going to change and I couldn't build a life with him, and I'd come to terms with it. I had started dating and meeting new people, and not holding onto the idea of him anymore. I know you don't understand and I can't explain it well but it's over anyway. he's gone. that chapter is over. not just a chapter, the whole book. I'm starting over.